Mommy guilt.
I'm sure there are moms that somehow skate by without this struggle. But I'm not one of those moms and I suspect you aren't either. I've felt those pangs. And finally decided that it's just no way to live.
Living under constant guilt will cripple us at best- defeat us at worst. Not to mention how it diminishes our influence and negatively impacts our attititude.
So, how do we replace the guilt with something more positive and productive?
First, let's see how we're doing in this area of guilt. Rank yourself in each of the following questions 1-5.
1---> not at all
2---> every now and then
3---> yes, somewhat
4---> yes, I feel this way often
5---> yes, I feel this way every time this happens without exception
QUIZ:
1) When your child gets in trouble, do you feel it's your fault?
_______
2) When you go on a date with your husband, do you feel badly for leaving your kids?
_______
3) When you hear other moms planning activities for their children, do you feel inadequate?
_______
4) When you hear a parenting seminar or sermon, does it cripple you more than inspire you?
_______
5) When you plan an event for your child like a birthday party, do you feel like you don't measure up?
_______
6) When you tell your child no, do you struggle with sticking to that answer?
_______
Okay, now add up your numbers and use your total score to see how you did below:
24-30: Guilt is holding me back from being the mom I want to be and I didn't even realize how much. It's time to tackle this issue head on.
18-23: Guilt is a struggle in motherhood. I've known that but didn't know how to deal with it. It's time to learn.
12-17: Guilt is not something I struggle with often but could still benefit from getting tips on how to deal with it.
6- 11: Wow! Can you tell us your secret in the comments below? You are a guilt-free chick!
So, how did you do? If you feel comfortable, post your score or thoughts below. I'd love to pray for you if you are struggling or cheer you on if you're doing well right now.
On Monday, I'm going to give some more doable, practical ideas that you can start implementing right away.
But, I want to leave you with first big idea today...
Pinpoint one area of true struggle for you where improvement is needed. Instead of using your shortcomings to mentally beat yourself up, see this as a call to action in this one area.
It might be hard. It might take discipline. But it really will be possible for you to get to the root of the issue, replace resignation with truth, and be freed from the guilt.
Write out your call to action. Then look up Scripture verses that deal with this issue specifically.
Find wisdom verses about this issue in Proverbs.
Find promises within the Psalms.
Find inspirational teachings by Jesus in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.
Find challenge in Colossians.
Find Joy in Philippians.
Find accountability and mentoring in both books of Timothy.
Find that the battle is already won in Revelation.
And be sure to leave any insights you get from your verses in the comments below. We'll make this an on-going dialogue this weekend.
Have a happy, guilt-free day bloggy friends!
ps. You gals blew me away with over 1200 of you responding to my "Event" survey!!! If you are a women's ministry director, you will want to see the results to this eye-opening survey before you plan another event at your church!
Simply e-mail : Holly@Proverbs31.org and put "Event Survey" in the subject line of your e-mail. We'll send you the full report next week.
I'm sure there are moms that somehow skate by without this struggle. But I'm not one of those moms and I suspect you aren't either. I've felt those pangs. And finally decided that it's just no way to live.
Living under constant guilt will cripple us at best- defeat us at worst. Not to mention how it diminishes our influence and negatively impacts our attititude.
So, how do we replace the guilt with something more positive and productive?
First, let's see how we're doing in this area of guilt. Rank yourself in each of the following questions 1-5.
1---> not at all
2---> every now and then
3---> yes, somewhat
4---> yes, I feel this way often
5---> yes, I feel this way every time this happens without exception
QUIZ:
1) When your child gets in trouble, do you feel it's your fault?
_______
2) When you go on a date with your husband, do you feel badly for leaving your kids?
_______
3) When you hear other moms planning activities for their children, do you feel inadequate?
_______
4) When you hear a parenting seminar or sermon, does it cripple you more than inspire you?
_______
5) When you plan an event for your child like a birthday party, do you feel like you don't measure up?
_______
6) When you tell your child no, do you struggle with sticking to that answer?
_______
Okay, now add up your numbers and use your total score to see how you did below:
24-30: Guilt is holding me back from being the mom I want to be and I didn't even realize how much. It's time to tackle this issue head on.
18-23: Guilt is a struggle in motherhood. I've known that but didn't know how to deal with it. It's time to learn.
12-17: Guilt is not something I struggle with often but could still benefit from getting tips on how to deal with it.
6- 11: Wow! Can you tell us your secret in the comments below? You are a guilt-free chick!
So, how did you do? If you feel comfortable, post your score or thoughts below. I'd love to pray for you if you are struggling or cheer you on if you're doing well right now.
On Monday, I'm going to give some more doable, practical ideas that you can start implementing right away.
But, I want to leave you with first big idea today...
Pinpoint one area of true struggle for you where improvement is needed. Instead of using your shortcomings to mentally beat yourself up, see this as a call to action in this one area.
It might be hard. It might take discipline. But it really will be possible for you to get to the root of the issue, replace resignation with truth, and be freed from the guilt.
Write out your call to action. Then look up Scripture verses that deal with this issue specifically.
Find wisdom verses about this issue in Proverbs.
Find promises within the Psalms.
Find inspirational teachings by Jesus in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.
Find challenge in Colossians.
Find Joy in Philippians.
Find accountability and mentoring in both books of Timothy.
Find that the battle is already won in Revelation.
And be sure to leave any insights you get from your verses in the comments below. We'll make this an on-going dialogue this weekend.
Have a happy, guilt-free day bloggy friends!
ps. You gals blew me away with over 1200 of you responding to my "Event" survey!!! If you are a women's ministry director, you will want to see the results to this eye-opening survey before you plan another event at your church!
Simply e-mail : Holly@Proverbs31.org and put "Event Survey" in the subject line of your e-mail. We'll send you the full report next week.
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