I have been up most of the night with a sick child. Fever, coughing, aching, can't sleep a wink kind of yuck has hopped on my Ashley. Yes, this is the same Ashley that is supposed to be competing in the North Carolina State Gymnastics Meet this weekend. And yes, this is the same Ashley you prayed for two weeks ago who competed with a sinus infection and earache.
She has been healthy and feeling great for a week and a half now... but yesterday things just sort of fell apart.
The State Meet is the pinnacle meet where the girls who will go on to Regionals are chosen. I know in the grand scheme of life, this pales in comparison to many more serious matters. But, in her little world this is a really big deal. One that she has worked hours upon hours to prepare for and now her body is too weak to attend today's final practice.
To a mom watching her little girl in tears over this, it is certainly a recipe for getting all worked into a tizzy... as we say in the south. But I am making a conscious choice to refuse Tizzy's invitation and instead embrace whatever it is God is wanting to teach us in this situation.
Trust is the word of the hour.
But sometimes trust is an awfully big pill to swallow. Especially when it means taking a completely different route than what you were expecting. That's why we must often choose to trust despite our feelings.
I feel the best thing would be for Ashley to experience a miraculous healing this morning, run off to practice, have a stellar meet, and rejoice in the fruit of all her hard work this year. But this is highly unlikely. So, when this isn't possible, I could feel hurt or even let down by God. I can't stand to see my child suffer. Why did she have to get sick on this weekend? Yes, it would be so easy to get all worked into a tizzy for sure.
So, I'm making the choice not to go down the questioning God path. I am choosing to trust God and stand on his promises. Proverbs 3: 5-6 remind us... "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your path straight."
As I got up, still exhausted from lack of sleep, I uttered the words, "I trust you Lord. I trust your plan. I trust your goodness. I trust what you can see and I can't. I trust you with my girl, her hopes, her dreams, and her disappointments. I trust you with it all Lord."
For I have walked with the Lord through enough disappointments to have learned that His path is the best path. When we ask Him to take a certain turn that we think looks so good and He says no... it is for our good.
His "no" could be for our PROTECTION... protecting us from something we can't see. Maybe this sickness is the very thing God is using to protect Ashley from attending today's practice and getting severely hurt. Maybe she won't even be able to compete at all this weekend. And maybe that is His protection as well.
His "no" could be for our PROVISION... providing something so much better than what we thought was the best thing. In our minds the best thing would be for Ashley to compete feeling her best. But she had her best meet this entire year, with a sinus infection and ear ache. Who knows? Only God... so whether she competes or not, we are certain of His provision.
His "no" could simply be part of the PROCESS of growing Ashley closer to Himself... when we are weak, only then can we truly understand how He can be our strength. Whether that is strength to compete or strength to let this dream die, I pray she embraces this part of the process of growing closer to God.
The last time she competed, you were all so gracious and posted prayers and Scriptures for Ashley to read. She sat in the little hotel bed and read and prayed through everything you wrote. It encouraged her heart, more than you can imagine.
So, I am asking again.
The comments are for her today, whatever wisdom or prayer you'd like to share.
And if this situation speaks to your heart, though your circumstances might be different, we'd love to spend time praying for you as well. So, just let us know.
She has been healthy and feeling great for a week and a half now... but yesterday things just sort of fell apart.
The State Meet is the pinnacle meet where the girls who will go on to Regionals are chosen. I know in the grand scheme of life, this pales in comparison to many more serious matters. But, in her little world this is a really big deal. One that she has worked hours upon hours to prepare for and now her body is too weak to attend today's final practice.
To a mom watching her little girl in tears over this, it is certainly a recipe for getting all worked into a tizzy... as we say in the south. But I am making a conscious choice to refuse Tizzy's invitation and instead embrace whatever it is God is wanting to teach us in this situation.
Trust is the word of the hour.
But sometimes trust is an awfully big pill to swallow. Especially when it means taking a completely different route than what you were expecting. That's why we must often choose to trust despite our feelings.
I feel the best thing would be for Ashley to experience a miraculous healing this morning, run off to practice, have a stellar meet, and rejoice in the fruit of all her hard work this year. But this is highly unlikely. So, when this isn't possible, I could feel hurt or even let down by God. I can't stand to see my child suffer. Why did she have to get sick on this weekend? Yes, it would be so easy to get all worked into a tizzy for sure.
So, I'm making the choice not to go down the questioning God path. I am choosing to trust God and stand on his promises. Proverbs 3: 5-6 remind us... "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your path straight."
As I got up, still exhausted from lack of sleep, I uttered the words, "I trust you Lord. I trust your plan. I trust your goodness. I trust what you can see and I can't. I trust you with my girl, her hopes, her dreams, and her disappointments. I trust you with it all Lord."
For I have walked with the Lord through enough disappointments to have learned that His path is the best path. When we ask Him to take a certain turn that we think looks so good and He says no... it is for our good.
His "no" could be for our PROTECTION... protecting us from something we can't see. Maybe this sickness is the very thing God is using to protect Ashley from attending today's practice and getting severely hurt. Maybe she won't even be able to compete at all this weekend. And maybe that is His protection as well.
His "no" could be for our PROVISION... providing something so much better than what we thought was the best thing. In our minds the best thing would be for Ashley to compete feeling her best. But she had her best meet this entire year, with a sinus infection and ear ache. Who knows? Only God... so whether she competes or not, we are certain of His provision.
His "no" could simply be part of the PROCESS of growing Ashley closer to Himself... when we are weak, only then can we truly understand how He can be our strength. Whether that is strength to compete or strength to let this dream die, I pray she embraces this part of the process of growing closer to God.
The last time she competed, you were all so gracious and posted prayers and Scriptures for Ashley to read. She sat in the little hotel bed and read and prayed through everything you wrote. It encouraged her heart, more than you can imagine.
So, I am asking again.
The comments are for her today, whatever wisdom or prayer you'd like to share.
And if this situation speaks to your heart, though your circumstances might be different, we'd love to spend time praying for you as well. So, just let us know.
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