Dear Bathroom Scale,
You are no longer my friend. There are two fundamental rules to being my friend and well... you've officially messed things up.
First, you have been saying unkind things to me lately. I mean hello... I visit with you regularly every morning. I invest time in our relationship. I'm quite considerate of you. I work out and watch what I eat... kind of. All I need is a few words of encouragement. A few I tell you... is that too much to ask?
But no, during our last month of visits you just keep being rude and flashing numbers that quite simply bum me out.
Secondly, you can't seem to keep a secret to save your life. Those brownies I ate 2 of yesterday... okay maybe more than 2... but I asked you to keep that a secret.
But noooooo, missy prissy, you just had to tell the whole bathroom this morning about the upward movement of the numbers.
I really wanted to like you. But, alas I think we must break up.
I'm moving on to bigger and better things.
No, wait, not bigger... smaller and better things.
Yes, and if I ever find them, maybe we can be friends again.
You are no longer my friend. There are two fundamental rules to being my friend and well... you've officially messed things up.
First, you have been saying unkind things to me lately. I mean hello... I visit with you regularly every morning. I invest time in our relationship. I'm quite considerate of you. I work out and watch what I eat... kind of. All I need is a few words of encouragement. A few I tell you... is that too much to ask?
But no, during our last month of visits you just keep being rude and flashing numbers that quite simply bum me out.
Secondly, you can't seem to keep a secret to save your life. Those brownies I ate 2 of yesterday... okay maybe more than 2... but I asked you to keep that a secret.
But noooooo, missy prissy, you just had to tell the whole bathroom this morning about the upward movement of the numbers.
I really wanted to like you. But, alas I think we must break up.
I'm moving on to bigger and better things.
No, wait, not bigger... smaller and better things.
Yes, and if I ever find them, maybe we can be friends again.
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