Lickity-Split

Sometimes a girl just needs chocolate!

And we all know that it's impossible to get all the batter you need with just a spoon or spatula... sometimes only your head in the bowl and your tongue will do.

The look of sweet victory!

She's just like her momma... we both like to get to the heart of the matter! Seriously, this just has to be a sign of some kind of genius--- it would never occur to me to cut a piece of brownie out of the center~ Have mercy girls do love their chocolate.

When and if we ever get to do that sleepover many of you keep asking about... Brooke will be our chef for sure. You don't mind that she sticks her head in the bowl right?

Teach me something sister~

Last week, during the She Speaks Q&A, several of you asked about blogging rules. I find this quite funny because I am the furthest thing from a blog expert. I am new at this blogging thing and often find myself asking lots of questions about the how's and why's and do's and don'ts of blogging.

So, I thought I'd turn the question back on you... my amazing blogging friends. Why don't you post a comment today about some kind of blogging tidbit.

It can be a technical tidbit that you figured out...
a blogging testimony...
something about the etiquette of blogging...
or just a perspective about blogging.

Just remember to make sure your comment is constructive, not critical. I'd love to learn from you today. And I'll be checking the comments and throwing in my two cents worth every now and then as well.

Just two more little housekeeping notes...
Early Bird registration for the She Speaks Conference ends today. So, if you have been pondering and wondering about when to register... today is your day. The conference is filling up quickly. I just got word from the office yesterday that we are already half full. Amazing! I hope I'll get to meet many of you there.

Lastly, Holly and I spoke at a memorial for Brian Rau, the cyclist killed in front of my house. It has been one month since his death. A special thank you to the gals at Connect Ministry for making this happen. Will you all keep praying for the Rau family. They are really doing well but as you can imagine, their loss is overwhelming at times.

I'll leave you with a verse that I shared last night...

Isaiah 26: 3-4, "You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the rock eternal."

Happy Thursday everybody. I can't wait to learn from you today.

Why My April Might be a Little Greasy

I have found that a true test for how I'm doing spiritually can be found in examining my actions but even more so in my reactions. I can carefully think through my actions. But reactions seem to be a truer test of what is bottled up in my heart.

Living with 4 teenagers, one nine year old princess, a hunk of a husband, two dogs, and I'm sure a mouse or two... provides me with lots of reactions to examine. Just this morning I discovered that someone decided to make pizza in the late evening hours. That is fine. However, they also decided that my planner would be a perfect place upon which to rest their greasy, cheesy, saucy slice of pizza.

April of 2008 will now officially be my greasy month. Every time I turn to write in an appointment for this forth month, I will have to navigate around spots that my pen refuses to mark over. I mean really people... I hate sending notes to school with grease stains. It just smacks of unclean counter tops. And now I have to tote my planner around with residue of a pizza slice from back in February smeared about?

Hmmmmffffff!!!!!

Back to what is bottled up in my heart... have you ever shaken a bottle of coke? I mean really like danced to that song, "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" kind of shaking. Yes, and then just ever so slightly twisted the cap. It only takes the smallest opening and carbonated sugar will spray everywhere.

I can identify with the coke bottle.

Someone spilled super glue on my hardwood floors and half heartedly tried to clean it by smearing it into an absolute mess... shake, shake, shake.

Someone didn't care to notice that their cherry tomato somehow rolled from their salad onto my white chair. The next poor soul that sat down created a slight tomato explosion... shake, shake, shake.

The video store just called to inform me that I have once again purchased a video that no one seems to remember renting... shake, shake, shake.

April is supposed to be the month of flowers and gentle spring showers. Mine will look and smell like old grease... shake, shake, shake.

Sometimes I feel like I get shaken and shaken and shaken and shaken... and then pity that person who tries to twist my top ever so slightly. Unless I sit and let the Lord diffuse my shaken carbonated heart, I will spew.

That's why it is essential for me to meet with Jesus every morning. Every single morning...seriously... I can't miss a day. Sitting with Jesus I gain a perspective beyond myself. He helps me see the blessings in the messies. He fills my heart with compassion and a gentleness that is beyond my ability to just conjure up.

In Matthew 12: 34-35 Jesus says, "Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks. The good man brings good out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil out of the evil stored up in him."

I do want my kids to be more responsible and aware of their sometimes careless actions. But I must set an example for them in the way I react. Just this morning, about the time I discovered my greasy April, I was challenged with Proverbs 15:1, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."

Oh how I want this to be the hallmark of my mouth!

I'm off to ponder some gentle answers. I guess I'll try to limit the shaking to my stellar dance moves.

Random Acts of Kindness

Thanks for visiting Lysa's blog - she took a serious leap of faith by letting me guest blog today! As her assistant, running partner, and traveling companion, I'm also very thankful to call her a friend.

There are lots of things I love. In addition to the obvious - family, friends, meaningful conversations, eating, running, and eating some more, I also love random acts of kindness. Not only doing them, but I must admit I thoroughly enjoy receiving them as well!

Hmmm...can I even recall the last time I performed a simple random act of kindness for someone?

I know that Jesus asks us to do these in secret...so...let's think about those sweet times someone randomly did something special for us.

Oh how these seemingly small tasks have touched me more than I could ever fairly express.

I've had friends randomly:

buy me a book
call me just to say 'hi', and then do it again the next day
watch my kids, and love them as their own
bake me banana bread
listen to me ramble
help me organize my house

AND... I even had one friend who told me that I was gorgeous in a birthday card. That's all she wrote - 'Holly, you are gorgeous'. Her random act of kindness through her written words resonated in my heart for months. Months I tell you! Imagine that. I am gorgeous! That was back in September, and I'm still feeling gorgeous!

So why wait. I think that today is a good day for us to do something very random and very kind.

For someone.
For anyone.
Just because.

It's the perfect way to spread the light and love of Jesus.

Will you join me blogging friends?

Holly

Writing and Speaking Questions Answered

Good morning sweet bloggy sisters! Whew... I had quite a weekend but it was great. Thanks to Renee Swope and my other P 31 sisters, you did not have to wait all weekend for the answers to your many questions. I was in Virginia Beach this weekend and my internet service went down. So, my friends came to my rescue. This brings me to the answer of the most frequent question I get asked, "How do you do all that you do?"

I could write a lot on this question about how God taught this normally scatterbrained Chick, how to get intentional with every bit of time I have. But I think I'll share a different part of the answer today. One big reason I am able to do what I do with raising 5 kids, running a ministy, speaking and writing is that I surround myself with amazing people.

Did you see the way that my P31 sisters just stepped in without missing a beat to help me out? And on a weekend at that.

Now, that answer begs another question. How do you attract amazing people and invite them into the vision of your ministry? I'm convinced that every person has locked within them incredible potential. We are all made in the image of the Almighty God, right? So, I look for people who long to be used by God in teaching and writing. I don't look for superstars. I don't look for the most polished and put together. I look for that women who has the gift of pause... that when the rest of the world rushes by a least of them, these ladies would notice, stop, and take action.

You see to become part of the Proverbs 31 Ministries' speaker team, you have to first attend the She Speaks conference and then serve the ministry for a season before you start getting speaking opportunities. This helps people to know whether they feel called to the ministry or are just attracted to the opportunities our ministry offers. There is a big difference.

Those that are called to this ministry, I feel very passionate about making sure they get opportunities that will bring their ministry to life. The Lord challenged me a long time ago that I was to honor Him with every opportunity I got by asking myself a question each time somthing big happened. The question is this: "Who else can I bless with this opportunity I've just been given." And I think every woman on our team asks a similiar question as we love to help each other grow, share opportunities, and cheer each other on in our successes.

Does all this come naturally? Not always. But we make choices to protect that bond of unity that God has blessed us with.

Now, here are a few other answers to questions you asked:

A trivia question how old were you when your first book was published?
My first book was released in 2000. I was 31 years old.

How did you zero in on the topic for your first book?
After years of trying to get published to no avail... I stopped trying. But I did not stop writing. I told God I would be faithful with every writing opportunity and I trusted Him with the publishing thing. To be honest, I was so weary from all the rejection. Then one day I wrote an article for Larry Burkett's magazine called "Living Life On Purpose." I thought it was the worst artice I ever wrote. But the Vice President of Moody Publishers read it and liked it and offered me a book contract. My first book was appropriately named, "Living Life On Purpose."

Which came first for you - speaking or writing?
Writing small articles came first. Then I started speaking. As my speaking ministry grew, my opportunities for writing in more major publications seemed to grow as well.

I'll leave you with just a couple of parting thoughts... "Wisdom is to do now what you will be satisfied with later." This quote applies to many things in life, but especially the sacrifices that are necessary when pursuing ministry. Be faithful in the little everyday things now, and God will use those seemingly insignificant things to prepare you for ministry. God develops our character to match our calling in the fields of everyday life.

Now for the winner of the "For the Write Reason" book:
Amanda!

Congrats Amanda. Please send us your address and I'll make sure it is sent out to you right away... Lysa1@Proverbs31.org.

She Speaks Q&A

Hi there. This is Renee Swope, posting as a guest on Lysa's blog. She is in Virginia speaking this weekend and was having some technical difficulties last night so she asked me to give you an update on our She Speaks Q&A.

First, we are so excited about your great questions! We are really encouraged by your desire to pursue God's dreams for you as a speaker, writer and women's ministry leader.

Since we had so many questions to answer, and since we have such an amazing team of writers/speakers/women's ministry leaders, we called in some of the troops to help. I know you will be blessed by all of their perspectives and experiences as well as Lysa's .

I have to confess that we just recruited them last night, so it may be late morning or midday before they can post their answers. If you happen to stop by before their answers are up, I encourage you to look around and get to know more about their speaking and writing ministry through their blogs. One thing I love is that we have a variety of experience levels. Many of our speakers and writers have been just where you are - not so long ago.

Simply click on the names below to link to their blogs where you can find answers to many of the questions that were asked in yesterday's comments.

Glynnis Whitwer
Karen Ehman
Amy Carroll
Melissa Taylor
Renee Swope
Rachel Olsen

More names may be added as we hear back from our team, so be sure to stop by later today. Lysa will also be home tonight and she'll be posting answers to questions specifically for her as well as other topics. She will also announce the winner of the book we are giving away - For the Write Reason.

Thanks for sharing your stories, your thoughts and your questions. It really encourages us to be able to share with you all that God has shared with us along the way.

Blessings,
Renee

You've got questions... I'll find some answers

* Hi Sweet Friends...wow! You have blown me and my team away with your great questions. We look forward to answering the ones posted thus far. But, there were so many questions, I had to stop taking new comments for now. Let us get these answered and catch our breath. Thanks!

I remember walking into my first meetings with publishers watching my treasured manuscripts being put in big stacks with other's manuscripts. I remember well the "don't call us, we'll call you" looks the acquisition editors gave me. And I definitely remember every single one of the many, many rejection letters I received.

I promised God that if I ever had a book published that I would help those coming behind me. When I finally held that book with my name on the cover, I remembered my promise and started the She Speaks Conference.

This year Proverbs 31 Ministries will host our 8th annual "She Speaks" conference on June 20-22, 2008 in Concord, North Carolina. I'd love to meet each of you and hear about your dreams.

So, this weekend, I am hosting a speaking and writing Q&A. Ask anything related to what it's like being in ministry, speaking, writing, leadership, or the She Speaks conference in the comments box below. You supply the questions and I'll have a fun time coming up with answers. I might even have some of the other P31 gals join in the discussions.

If you know all about the conference already, you can skip on down to the comments box. If you want to learn more about the conference... read below first.

I am very passionate about the She Speaks conference for speakers, writers and women’s ministry leaders because I’ve experienced first hand the amazing things God does with the ladies that attend.

For Speakers: Whether you are ready to take the main stage and start speaking at conferences and retreats or whether you want to learn how to more effectively teach a ladies’ Bible Study- this track is for you. After attending this conference you will be equipped to:

• Know how to develop a message from start to finish
• Understand what keeps an audience engaged and how to make your message memorable
• Deliver your message in such a way that not only inspires your audience but motivates them to make life changes
• Increase your number of booked speaking engagements by using proven marketing strategies.

For Writers: You have had a passion for writing and have even had people encourage you to write a book, but have never known how to get started on the pathway to publication. You will have the chance to attend sessions taught by some of the top Christian publishers and make appointments to pitch your book proposal. Or maybe you are a blogger and just want to learn how to more effectively connect with your readers and increase the impact of your blog. What better way than to sit in sessions taught by three of the most widely read blog authors: Boo Mama, Big Mama, and Rocks in My Dryer. Whatever the case may be, after attending this conference you will:

• Discover your unique writing voice and the mechanics of effective writing
• Understand what publishers are looking for and how to write proposals that get their attention
• Better understand how to build your writing portfolio by getting published in magazines
• Know how to write a book that will impact your reader from start to finish

For Women’s Ministry Leaders: You know first hand the unique opportunities and challenges that present themselves when you lead a ministry in your church for women. You give and serve all year long--- now is your chance to get filled back up with encouragement and training. You’ll have the opportunity to attend a Pre-Conference Intensive as well as the women’s ministry leadership track where you’ll learn how to:

• Build a dream team of ministry partners
• Cast your vision for ministry in a way others will catch it
• Distinguish God's direction for your ministry with confidence.
• Celebrate milestones of your ministry's effectiveness and keep your team inspired.

We also have a track for middle school and high school girls called The Next Generation. This track is specifically designed for girls who have the desire to speak, write, or be a stronger leader for Christ in their sphere of influence.

I hope to see many of you at She Speaks this year. And hey... if you are already planning on attending, let us all know about it in the comments section below as well!

* If you leave a comment or a question below, you'll be entered to win Marybeth Whalen's book, "For the Write Reason." This is a fantastic resource for aspiring writers and even includes a section on writing book proposals that get noticed by publishers.

To find out more about registering for the 2008 She Speaks conference visit the conference website by clicking here.

The Muffin Top Diaries

Hello.

My name is Lysa TerKeurst and much to my dismay I have been informed there is a name to my condition. Muffin top.

If you don't know what a muffin top is, let's do a little activity. Are you sitting down? If not, sit. Do you feel a slight roll of a pouch begging to hang over the top of the waistband of your jeans? Now picture in your mind how a muffin sits in that little pleated paper wrapper. Can you see in your minds eye how at the place the paper ends the little muffin top peeks up and over her waistband too?

Yummy.

No. No. No. No. Not yummy Lysa... not yummy at all. No muffins or treats of any kind for you today. Walk directly to the veggies and fruit aisle.... do not pass go, do not collect $200.

I have been informed by my friends who have successfully passed the 40 year mark that a muffin top is indeed one of the gifts you receive upon approaching your 40th year of life.

And so, I as ever so eagerly knock on the door of 39 said muffin top seems to be making her debut. Now, don't get me wrong, I am absolutely delighted to be turning 39 this year and 40 next year. But the muffin top must go people.

I will not welcome her on my tummy.
I will not welcome her though the treats seem yummy.

I could not stand her for a day.
I will not, can not let her have her way.

Seriously. Why do those cookies, brownies, chips with queso, and french fries- extra salt, bathed in Catsup seem so much more enticing than apples, carrot sticks, and lettuce leaves?

I think I need to go have a couple of M&M's and ponder this some more.

No. No. No. No. I meant to say some pouched egg whites with all the flavory goodness sucked out of them and one piece of whole wheat toast, dry please. Really, I don't want any butter at all. Really.

Daddy, do you love me?

Welcome to the Proverbs 31 devotion readers who have popped over today. Feel free to leave a comment below. If you are not familiar with blogging, just click the anonymous button and type your comment in the text box provided. I'm glad you're here today. I'd love to have you visit me anytime.

When I was eight years old, I remember wanting one thing more than anything else…my Daddy’s love. I remember standing beside his chair twirling around while my heart cried out for his attention. "Daddy, do you notice me? Daddy, am I beautiful? Daddy am I your special little girl? Daddy, do you love me?” But my Daddy never gave me those words of affirmation.

While my earthly Daddy didn’t notice me, my Heavenly Daddy did. God promises to be a father to the fatherless and fill in the emotional gaps left behind from those who have abandoned us. Throughout my whole life, He has brought experiences my way that if I’ll notice His hand in it, reveal the depth of His love for me.

A couple of summers ago, I had the privilege to attend the Billy Graham crusade in New York City with Billy’s daughter, Ruth. Ruth and I have been friends and prayer partners for several years. We met and instantly bonded at a women’s conference. To me, she is just Ruth. My friend who I laugh, cry, pray, and experience life with. I often forget about the celebrity status of her family.

But at the crusade there was no forgetting. Famous people were all around us as we made our way through the crowd to our reserved seats. My then 11 year old daughter Hope, who was with me, kept exclaiming…, “Mom, there is Amy Grant and Vince Gill! Mom, there are the Clintons who used to live in the White House!”

I kept wondering who am I? I don’t belong here with all these famous people. But right as the questions and doubt started to creep in, Ruth handed us badges to wear. All the famous people had them on. However, our badges had a gold star on the bottom. I quickly realized the meaning of this gold star as we walked past the famous people and sat with the Graham family. The gold star meant we were part of the family.

I sat down and wiped the tear that started to make its way down my cheek. I looked up to Heaven and winked at my Heavenly Daddy. His voice was so tender, as He once again whispered to my heart, “Lysa, you are not the child of a broken parent who couldn’t give you love. You are a child of God. Yes, Lysa, I notice you. Yes, Lysa, you are beautiful. Yes, Lysa, you are my special little girl. And yes, Lysa, I love you.”

Dear Lord, help me to know, believe, and walk in that truth everyday. As I think back on my childhood and some of the gaps my parents left in my heart, help me to forgive and release those into your loving hands. Lord, like Psalm 73:26 says, will you be my strength and my portion today and always?”

Running toward a Giant

There will always be scary things in our life. Just like if you touch fire, you will get burned... If you encounter one of your giants, you will be afraid. It's just one of those life fundamentals that are hard to navigate around. But every now and then we see the triumph of the human spirit when a small person faces an impossible giant and wins.

It evokes in all of us a sense of possibility, intrigue, fascination, and maybe envy. They are small like us. Yet, at some point they decide to stop being so small and they rise to an occasion of epic proportions.

We see this and we wonder, could I possibly have within me the ability to run toward a giant rather than shrink away?

I think I first tasted this possibility in the strangest of ways. I was a nerd in elementary and middle school. Seriously uncool, underdeveloped, and undone that no boy ever passed me the note. You know the one---"Will you go with me? Check yes or no." Then I found my hero.

Yes ma'am. She too had been a nerd. But then there was a glorious day when she dawned some black leather pants, curled her hair just right, and glided across the screen singing, "You're the One That I Want, You're the only One I Want...ewe, ewe, ewe, Honey." Man my world was a blaze that day. I just knew that if only I could get my hands on those pants and that curling iron, that John Travolta could possibly fall in love with me too.

Excuse me while I gag myself with a spoon and thank the Lord I have matured past John.

Okay, so where were we? Oh yes. Giants.

They are real. We let them taunt us and mock us and make us feel so incapable. They make us excuse certain Bible verses about God's power in us. And so we sit back and just hope the giant will one day go away. Maybe if we mature enough, the giant won't seem so giant after all. But years go by and the giant is still there... still mocking and taunting and blocking.

The Israelites knew all about how paralyzing it can be to have a giant in your midst. Goliath stood and called out to the Israelites begging them to send a man to fight him. He made fun of them, and worse yet, he made fun of their God. The Israelites were dismayed and terrified.

Then along comes a simple shepherd boy who has very little battle sense, no armor, and no business being on the battlefield except to take his brothers some food. David hears Goliath and is dismayed. Not at his size, but at the audacity of his words.

Though David was small in stature, he was big time in love with God. So much so, that he couldn't sit by and watch Goliath make fun of His people and His God. He couldn't let God's people stand in the shadow of condemnation. He couldn't stand that the shouts of Goliath drowned out the people's prayers to the Almighty. The giant made God's men shake and shrink away.

But not David. Not this shepherd boy. Not this young man who sat with the flocks of sheep and heard God Himself whisper, "I am your shepherd David. You shall not want. I will lead you beside still waters. See how I restore your soul."

David grabs a sling and 5 smooth stones.

And God's whisper continues, "Even though you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, do not be afraid."

And David takes off. Running toward his giant as fast as he can. The wind in his face and the whispers of God in his heart.

"I am with you David. My rod and my staff comfort you. I AM WITH YOU. I AM... is with YOU!"

At that David swings his sling around and with the strength not of a shepherd boy but rather of God Himself, flings a stone so hard that it embeds into the giants forehead causing instant death.

The thunderous fall of Goliath, I imagine, was followed by gasps and then silence.

Except for that whisper, "See David. I have prepared a table in the presence of your enemy. Remember how I annointed your head with oil. See how your cup overflows. Now the people see you are not just a shepherd boy. You are my chosen. Goodness and mercy will follow you as you dwell with Me forever."

May I too feel the wind in my face as I run, absolutely run, toward my giant. Oh, God. May the sounds of my world... my giants... the things I think are never possible... pale in comparison to your sweet whisper.

And, Lord, I mean it as a praise to you if I accidently bust out singing, "You're the One the I Want, You're the Only One I Want, ewe, ewe, ewe Honey." Only I promise to leave the black leather pants at home.

Every Minute

Last Friday morning at 1 a.m., Art woke me to tell me he thought something was wrong with his heart. My brain could not take in these words so I started operating in automatic mode. We spent the better part of the next minutes trying to decide what to do. When he agreed to go to the emergency room, I knew that it must be serious. My man is not a doctor going guy.

He spent the night getting poked and prodded and tested and examined.

I spent the night letting every what if imaginable play out in my head.

I am happy to report that Art is fine and it turns out so is his heart. Tests showed an extremely high level of enzymes which triggered a reflux attack severe enough to mimic a heart attack.

So, I breathe a sigh of relief. But I can't just move on. Somewhere in the middle of the night caught between everything could change and everything is fine, I was once again challenged to make every minute count. During those middle of the night hours, I was so intentional with every word that I spoke to my husband.

In those minutes not one of those silly things that I make such issues out of at times mattered. Not one. I couldn't even remember that he gets on my nerves at times. All I could think of, "Oh God give me more time with him please."

Maybe it sounds overly dramatic. But I've watched 4 young women in the past months walk up to a casket and say goodbye. Four women who thought they still had years and years left to say and do and give and love. Four women who closed their eyes one night as a wife and woke up the next day as a widow.

And it has rocked me in the best kind of way.

Maybe this isn't the most encouraging Monday morning post I've ever written. But then again, maybe it is.

Talking About You Know What

Seriously... how do I get myself into things like this?

Okay here goes…
How did I answer Brooke when she asked me about sex?

I did what any stunned parent would do. I answered her question with a question,
Me: Well, do you know what sex is?

Brooke: Yup, it’s how mommies and daddies create babies.

Me: Do you know anything else?

Brooke: Nope. I think I got it.

Me: Well, good. We will talk about it more some time.

Brooke: Okay, can we listen to High School Musical?

Me: I am kinda in the mood for Hannah Montana.

Brooke: Perfect.

I weathered the talks with my older four quite well.

I let my husband talk to my boys. They went on a camping trip and pretty much covered it all. When they came home I added in a little about Sexually Transmitted diseases. I printed off photos of leprosy from the internet. I mean they didn’t know the difference and the drama of falling off body parts was a nice effect.

I talked to my girls using a wonderful book I got from the Christian book store. And then I hid the book so Brooke wouldn’t find it. Now of course I can’t remember where I hid it or else I’d tell you the name of it.

Talking about sex with the kids is something that my husband and I have done fine with the other kids.

But Brooke is my baby.

Sigh.

So, I’ve called in the reserves to give out advice on this, AHEM, topic. What a treat to have my younger sister as a guest blogger today. She’s really great.

And I don’t resent her at all for being 5’ 10” and wearing like a size 2. Seriously… I’m happy to have removed all of the fat genes from mom’s uterus. But that’s a topic of joy for another day. Without further ado… here is my sister, whom I do dearly love!!!

Angee: We recently attended “Created By God” at our church with our oldest child who is in the Fifth grade. She is only 10 years old and I was not sure if such a young child was prepared for some of the things that would be discussed. She is still so innocent, and I wanted it to stay that way. I knew that she eventually had to learn about sex, but I was not sure I wanted her to have to learn about yet.

Unfortunately, it is something that is taught to our kids everywhere we turn but not in the manner I want my children to learn about it. I felt that she needed to learn why and how God had created it to be. After attending the class, I now see why it is taught to them at this age…..they still want to talk to you !

Probably one of the main things we learned from the class is that we, as parents, need to open up the line of communication with our children and be willing to discuss the topic of sex. They need to know it is something special that God created and intended for a married man and woman.

Sure…..there were lots of questions. After all she is only 10 and had just been shown pictures of every body part and its function fully described to her over a 2 day time period. But it was awesome being able to talk to her and answer her questions. It was a lot to take in but she was very receptive.

For the most part our talks have been great. That is until the other night when she looked at me and said “Mom, I just can not believe you and dad have done that 3 times!”

One kid down… two more to go. Oh my.

Thanks Angee!!! Too funny.

Now, I have to tell you about one more thing. My Pastor, Rob Singleton, is currently preaching a sermon series on sex. Kids ages 13 and older are encouraged to attend with their parents. Last Sunday was one of the best sermons I’ve ever heard for teens and parents to listen to together. I would encourage you to pop over to his blog sometime this weekend and listen. And word has it that he’s running a pretty great contest as well.

Speaking of contests… the winner from yesterday’s random drawing is: Jesuslegaleagle

Just e-mail me your address at Lysa1@Proverbs31.org

Congrats!!! Happy Weekend Everybody.

And that's enough

Since it is Valentines Day, I thought it might be appropriate to do a little Give Away. Today, I'll be giving away a set of my Focus on the Family books, "Capture His Heart" (for a woman to read) and "Capture Her Heart" (for a man to read).

First, I want to welcome my Proverbs 31 Devotion Readers that may have popped over from reading "Linger a Little Longer" today. If you'd like to enter the drawing by leaving a comment, click on the word comments below. If you don't have a blog, just click on the anonymous button and then type in your comment and put your name and e-mail address within the body of your comment. I'll be drawing the winner of today's give away, tomorrow. So check back to see if you won.

I have to admit that Valentines Day has never been one of my favorite holidays. Growing up, I was not one of those girls that got those notes passed to her that read, "Will you go with me? Check yes or no." Sigh. In high school I had a guy friend--- that I secretly liked. But he saw me as a kid sister and well, you don't buy roses for your kid sister. Sigh.

When I got married I thought my view on Valentines Day would surely change. But I set my husband up for failure right from the beginning. My expectations of his expression of undying love never quite matched the run by the grocery before you go home bouquet of flowers I got. Now, I'm not saying he didn't put a lot of thought into those flowers... all three minutes of those thoughts mean a lot mind you.

But then one day it hit me. When did I become so me focused? 1 Corinthians 13 outlines what love is and is not. After reading and re-reading these verses it occurred to me that love is what I decide to give not what I wait around to receive. The kind of love in these verses are not feelings based. They are wise decisions I must make in order to have the kind of love that lasts.

If I want love that is patient and kind, then I must make the choice to give love in this way. If I want my marriage to not fall into the trap of rude comments, self-seeking attitudes, anger, and resentment, I have to be willing to work at this. I must be quick to forgive, learn to hold my tongue and let go of some of my lofty expectations.

So, I probably won't have a dozen long stem beauties hand delivered to my door while the Hallelujah chorus strikes a chord. And maybe a vat of chocolate that won't make you gain a pound is a bit beyond my husband's ability to deliver. But I have him. I have his smile. And why would I ever think that isn't enough.

Now, about the contest... If you'd like to enter to win a set of these books leave a comment below and I'll randomly pick a winner.

And for my faithful readers that are wondering if I will post about "The Question" that Brooke asked from yesterday's post. You all are making me as nervous as she did. Heavens girls! Yes, I'll be posting about "It" tomorrow.

Reflections of a Child on Cold Medicine

We interrupt the spiritual truths planned for today to bring you reflections from a child clearly on some sort of cold medicine high.

You see, my mother called last night while I was at a meeting. She spoke with Brooke who was not feeling so hot and got the run down on all her symptoms. My mom knew exactly what to do. She told Hope to write a note instructing me to give Brooke 'Robitussin' by mouth and then put Vicks Vapor Rub on the bottom of her feet and cover them with socks. This is supposedly the latest and greatest cough remedy. (See disclaimer below.) However Hope, distracted by her many urgent text messages from friends, wrote the following---

"Robitussin- something to put on feet."

Luckily, I did not get this note. Otherwise Brooke would currently have purple feet to add to her assorted ailments.

This morning, I did give her the appropriate dose of another cold remedy and these were the conversations that followed:

Brooke: Is this really what you do all day?

Me: What?

Brooke: I mean I always thought you were just laying around watching TV or something while I was at school working soooooo hard.

Me: What? ! ? Who in the world do you think washes the clothes, shops for and puts away all the groceries, and scrapes the dried up cheerios from underneath the kitchen table each day?

Brooke: Daddy.

Me: (speechless)
_______________________________________________
A few hours later
_______________________________________________

Brooke: I need more medicine! I neeeeeeeeeeed more medicine. I neeeeeeeeed more medicine right now.

Me: I just gave you another dose of medicine.

Brooke: I didn't take it. I don't like how that one tastes.

Me: Medicine is not supposed to entertain and delight one's taste buds.

Brooke: I feel like I have a person inside my head crushing it up.

Me: Then take the medicine.

Brooke: I'd rather just feel my head being crushed up.

Me: (speechless.)
_________________________________________________
A few hours later
_________________________________________________

Brooke: Mommy, can I ask you a couple of questions?

Me: Sure sweetie. What about? (I'm envisioning her usual topics... fairies, a dance she made up, Webkins, or her latest plan for her birthday party that will take place in approximately 164 days... approximately.)

Brooke: Ummmmm.

Me: What?

Brooke: Sex.

Me: (really, really, speechless.)

Disclaimer--- Clearly, I am not a physician and would advise you not to follow any advice I ever give on medical issues. Unless of course you are eager for your child to say such things and ask such questions.

My story

Whenever I've stepped out to do something I felt God calling me to do the voices of criticism and condemnation have been there to greet me. Early on in ministry the voices were loud and cruel.

"You'll never be a speaker."
"You are not wanted."
"Look at you. Do you really think God could use someone like you?"

And sometimes it was the way I measured myself against other people, "She's so clever. She's so educated. She's so connected. Who am I compared to all that?"

So, I shrank back. I pulled away. I put up a front of perfection with carefully crafted words and a house and kids that looked just right. Polished on the outside yet completely undone on the inside.

Eventually the Lord called my bluff. He's good at that. I was simultaneously going through both "Experiencing God" and "Victory Over the Darkness." Often I would have tears stream from my eyes while attempting to get through the lessons. But one day it was more than just tears. It was sobs pouring from a chest so heavy with burdens I thought I might literally break apart. Down on my face, I asked God to speak to me.

What I heard in reply was one simple yet life changing question, "Will you share your story?"

"Yes, I will share my story. The good parts. The parts that are safe and tidy and acceptable."

But safe and tidy and acceptable were not what God was looking for.

He wanted the impossible. Totally impossible. Absolutely impossible... in my strength.

God wouldn't drop it. He met every one of my arguments with Scriptures about relying not on my strength but on Him. He untangled my need for approval with the challenge to live for an audience of One. He helped me see where the voices of doubt were coming from and challenged me to consider the source. And quite simply He kept whispering He loved me over and over again.

The first time I shared my story was nothing but an act of absolute obedience. I kept my head down and my guard up. I expected the ladies listening to all start stoning me...

... especially when I got to the part about my abortion.

The shame of all the abuse and rejection was nothing compared to the shame of my choice to abort my child. I'd wept over that choice. I'd repented. I'd gone to God hundreds of times and asked for forgiveness. I'd laid it down every time there was an alter call. But nothing brought the redemption that this day brought.

As I stood shaking at that podium, I shared exactly what and how God asked me to share. And then the miracle happened. As I finished and dared to look up at their reactions, tear stained faces were looking back and me. Mouths were whispering, "Me too. Me too."

In that moment, I finally understood, "What Satan means for evil, God can use for good." Seeing God use the very thing that made me feel utterly worthless to help others, changed everything. I was finally free from Satan's chains of shame and could see his lies for what they were.

I'm not sure why God had me share this today. But maybe you do.

Sometimes Laundry Stinks- or does it?

I'm sorry. I try not to complain very often. I do know that I am incredibly blessed to have a grocery store down the street and a washer and dryer to use when doing laundry. But sometimes I wake up on Monday mornings a little grumpy. Time to do it all again. I'll go buy food that gets eaten. I'll wash clothes that get dirty again. I'll sweep floors that just an hour later will be littered with crumbs.

Is there more to all this than just doing the tasks of everyday life?

Before I jumped into the normal routine this morning, I sat with Jesus. And this is what I found... some big truths by taking a little glance at David's life.

There are many things that fascinate me about King David's life. But probably the thing that grabs my heart the most was his absolute pursuit to give his all to God. Despite how other's saw him, his own propensity to sin, and lack of position in his own family, David had the sweet reassurance of God and that was enough.

Overlooked by everyone else. Handpicked by God.

To his older brothers, he was a pest. To, his father Jesse, he was just the youngest son. To on-lookers, he was just a shepherd boy. But to God, he was the one destined to be king. And not just any king. His lineage was the one from whom Jesus would come.

Overlooked by everyone else. Handpicked by God.

Even how he was anointed to be the future king is such a telling story. In 1 Samuel 16, God tells Samuel that He has rejected Saul as king and chosen one of Jesse's sons to be the replacement. Think of the list of qualifications that must have run through Samuel's head as he pondered which of Jesse's sons would be qualified for such a position: tall, smart, articulate, brave, groomed, well mannered, regal, a natural born leader. "But the Lord said to Samuel,'Do not consider his outward appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. (meaning Saul who had these qualities.) The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart" (verse 7).

Overlooked by everyone else. Handpicked by God.

Samuel has Jesse line all of his sons before him. All of them were to be looked at. Yet, Jesse doesn't call David in from tending sheep. Was this an oversight? An assumption? A judgment call? A necessity? A deliberate choice?

Overlooked by everyone else. Handpicked by God.

Samuel passes on each of Jesse's sons and then asks, "are these all the sons you have?"

I imagine Jesse pausing, scratching his head, and with a quizzical expression replying, "There is still the youngest but he is tending sheep." Surely one who spends his time taking care of animals is not the one to take care of a nation. He spends his days doing lowly tasks.

Overlooked by everyone else. Handpicked by God.

As soon as Samuel saw him, he knew he was the one. David was anointed to become king. But he was not immediately ushered to the throne. It was years before David would be recognized by the world. So, where did he go after being anointed as king? To a refining school? A government academy? Military training? Nope.

He went back out into the fields and continued to shepherd his flock. A king doing lowly tasks. A king living with the sheep. A king wearing the rags of the earth. A king willing to give his life to protect his flock. A king whose character was being refined in the fields of everyday life to prepare him for his calling.

How like us. In the midst of smelly laundry, dirty dishes, snotty noses, misplaced keys, overdue library books, bills, bills, and more bills, and that birthday gift that still needs to be mailed to grandma- there is training there. There is character building. There is attitude shaping. There is soul defining. There is heart grounding. All which must take place for us to become what God intends.

Ever feel overlooked by the world? Take heart sister- we are handpicked by God.

I am not just doing tasks. I am building a legacy. I am shaping God's kingdom. I am in the process of not only discovering my calling but that of my family as well. And I don't know about you, but it sure does make me look at my everyday tasks... even the smelly laundry in a whole different light.

Happy Monday!

Love

They say a picture is worth a thousand words.

But I also believe there are some words that are worth a thousand pictures.

Love.

Such a powerful word. One that makes you feel good. One that opens you up to a world of hurt.

Love can be the pinnacle of acceptance. But can also leave one in the deepest pit of rejection.

It can be flippantly spoken. I love chocolate. I love skiing.

It can cause a fond rush. I love pictures drawn by my kids. I love my husband's signature.

It can be a sweet balm. I love being your friend.

It can be an intense invitation that redefines you. I love you and want you to be my wife.

It can be the very essence of life. Jesus.

But it is such a slippery word. So hard to contain, reign in, or control.

You can offer it... but you can not make someone accept it.

You can live it...and still have people misunderstand it.

And then how do you really measure someone else's true feelings. By one conversation or the culmination of years of conversations?

Box it in and love runs away. Let it go and maybe love will return.
Maybe. Maybe not.

Fall into the arms of the only One truly worthy to be called love.

And He whispers, "Perfect love casts out fear. Perfect love dies for you. Perfect love remains."

Always remains. Always.

And then she gagged- like twice in a day

If you did not read this post, you will not get the full effect of this photo. Have mercy. Yes, the glove mentioned has reappeared. Why didn't I throw it away in Canada? Where exactly do you throw something like this away?

Seriously.

I did not know Brooke had said glove until she was licking her fingers and heard something latexy snap. (Oh I gag as I write!) And at the time we were making these cookies together at 5pm, she had not yet brushed said teeth. Oh I gag again.

I think instead of cookies I will be snacking on this today!

Super-calla-fragilistic-extreme-halitosis

Brooke: Mom we have to leave for school right now. I'm in a play this morning at assembly and it is VERRRRRRRRY important.

Me: Okay, did you make your bed? Did you pack your lunch? Did you brush your teeth?

Brooke: Yes, yes, and no that's disgusting.

Me: What's disgusting?

Brooke: Brushing your teeth in morning.

Me: Excuse me?

Brooke: Nope, that just doesn't work for me. It's gross to do that in the morning, mom.

Me: (About to hyperventilate because we are more than half way through the school year and it really hasn't occurred to me to ask this before. I just often like to ask questions in threes so brushing her teeth was just thrown in for good measure today.)

You mean today it's gross but the other previous one hundred or so days of school this year it has been fine to ummm brush them right?

Brooke: Nope.

Me: What about the cavity monsters that will surely be eating away at your teeth today and then you'll have to get the cavities filled which require shots and then when you get older you'll have to get root canals and ALL that could be avoided by simple brushing your teeth.

Brooke: You told me monsters weren't real. So it really doesn't bother me anymore.

Me: Well, too bad I'm the boss of you. Maybe there are other moms out there who don't care that their children have stink breath. You can hang a sign around your neck and go and stand out on the street. "Looking for a mom who doesn't mind stink breath." That's right. Your sign can read that. And then maybe they'll adopt you and you can all live together in one big happy stink breath family. But until then, you'll be brushing your teeth... in the morning, in the evening, and now I'm adding when you get home from school as well.

I like things in threes you know. And that's what got me into this mess in the first place. Sometimes ignorance is bliss--- even if it is a little stinky.

Touring with Hannah Montana

Dear Hannah Montana,

When you wrap up your current tour and get back to reading my blog, I'd love for you to consider my resume. I went to your movie yesterday and loved it. Loved every minute of it. Sang every word to every song right beside my three little girls. Who are not so little anymore but that is a subject for another day. We wore the glasses, own the hair, and bought the t-shirt.

Not only do I know the words to your songs but I know the beat to your music. And I can throw some pretty cool moves.

You see what got me thinking about all this was the number of moms in your audience. Women who are just like me. We pretend that we are just being sweet moms and letting our kids play your music on their way to school. But then, when we drop them off... we don't change it. No ma'am we blast it even louder! While singing every word and loving it- like totally.

To borrow some of my favs--- I'm gonna put on my old blue jeans... cause every body has those days... nobody's perfect but I'm gonna work it again and again till I get it right.

So for all those moms in your audience who struggle just like me with cellulite and feeling like we are getting to old to bust a move, you just have to put a mom up on that stage. Just for one song. I mean I would be so out of breath by the end, you'd have to have oxygen waiting back stage. That's what happens when you are knocking on the door of 40.

But don't let that scare you. I may look like just another car pooling, mac and cheese making, Bible study teaching mom. But underneath it all... I REALLY AM A ROCKSTAR!!!

You can have your people call my people.

Captured by, Enthralled with, Living Proof of

I long to live a life pleasing to Jesus. Not a plastic Christian life full of religious checklists and pretense. No, that would be hypocritical at best and deadening at worst.

I want to live completely with Jesus. Captured by His love. Enthralled with His teachings. Living proof of His truth.

There have been others who have gone before me who desired this as well. I find myself fascinated by the imperfect heros of faith who despite their shortcomings pleased God. But don't you find the sins those men and women a little unsettling at times? There is a part of me that wants them to be perfect so I can set some sort of standard in my life. Like a child gingerly making their way through the sand by placing their feet exactly in his mother's footprints. I want to find the hallmarks of their journey and follow in step.

But God never called me to follow them. Or to make my journey like theirs. It wasn't their perfect actions that carved a path to God's heart. It was something else. Something less defined that can't be outlined and disected. Something that was sometimes messy and offensive. But something that was so precious at the same time it caused God to pause.

Abandon.

That's what I believe it was. It's the same word to describe the little girl leaping from the bed's edge completely confident that her Daddy will catch her. It's the same thing that fueled David's courageous run toward Goliath with nothing but a sling and five smooth stones. And Joshua. And Moses. And Noah. And Paul.

"Everything I have. Everything I own. Everything I hope for. Everything I fear. Everything I love. Everything I dream. It's all yours Jesus. I trust you in complete and utter abandon."

It's the one thing that made the rich young ruler walk away in Luke 18. He asked Jesus how to inherit eternal life. A life of peace, assurance, joy despite circumstances and eternal security, "How do I get this?" he asked. "I follow the rules. I'm a good person."

Jesus was quick to reply, "You still lack one thing." Release. Let go of. Stop depending on. Cease striving for. Abandon. "Sell everything you have and follow me."

He stood on the edge of everything uncertain with the arms of all certainty waiting to catch him. And he just couldn't jump. He climbed off the bed. And lived his life entangeld in lesser things.

He was not captured by, enthralled with or living proof of the reality of Jesus.

God let this not be the tragedy of our lives.

Give me the courage to make my own path straight to your heart. That though it will not be perfect, I pray it is marked with that which makes you pause--- complete abandon to my will but utterly surrendered to yours.

And then she placed her tiny fingers on a typewriter

There once was a little girl...
with a battered heart.


She was told by the first love of her life...
that she was unwanted.

Her Daddy's silence made her cry. His words made her broken.


Then one day she was given an old typewriter...
and when she placed her fingers on the dusty keys, her heart settled.

Words came from her finger tips that her lips couldn't process.


Her poems cryptically told of hidden abuse.
Tears often smeared her little girl masterpieces.


Years passed... her fingers stilled, her heart grew cold, her lips cursed God.
But there were other people busy at their keyboards... pouring out inspired messages.

Messages that would one day reach her- in deep places- places long ago hidden away. Messages that told her she didn't have to be a child of a broken parent. She could be a child of God. She was wanted.

She is me.


Jesus used their striked keys to produce words- messages- books- Bible studies- keys that unlocked me, released me, held me, exposed me, and helped put me together again.


And then my fingers found their way back... and dared to strike a key or two or ten thousand. Letters became words. Words became chapters. Chapters became books. And somehow others were unlocked, held, exposed and helped.


Every one of us has words inside that were never meant to just rumble about, hidden away. They are meant to be shared. Given. Released. Spoken. Written.


And that's what each of you do on your blogs everyday. In the most amazing way, you are reaching and helping and teaching and filling other's lives. Thank you. You are all champions.


Like I said yesterday, my heart aches to be able to give each friend who stepped out and entered the contest a scholarship. But since my kids would prefer to still be able to eat this month, I better stick to the plan. I can only be a part of one person's "how I got to She Speaks" stories.


And that person is... Karla from Looking Towards Heaven.

For everyone else, please remember what Jesus called Himself--- "The Way."
He's not only our way to eternity, He is our way through life as well. And I am convinced, no matter what your circumstances are right now, if you know you are supposed to get to She Speaks- He will be your way.

Warning- Hillbillies spotted in Canada this weekend

What happens when the Hillbillies hit Canada?

They wear sling-back shoes with no socks in the 30cm of snow.

They don't know how to convert cm to inches so they just take a wild guess and tell their families several feet of snow--- several cold feet that is!

They blow the circuits of the bed and breakfast while trying to blow dry their southern hair.

They bring up the election at dinner only to realize they are in a different country.

They have not a clue what a soother is. Holly thought it was a heating pad. Silly girl. I thought it was a cough drop. Silly girl number two. It is in fact a baby pacifier. We call those things passies. They just laugh at us.

They open up their Bible to get ready for their message only to find a latex glove marking a certain spot. Thinking back over this past week, one seriously searches her brain trying to figure out where said glove could have possibly come from. And then one with 5 children remembers and gags! Ashley dissected a cow eyeball this week in science and brought her glove home with her. How the thing ended up in my Bible and traveled all the way to Canada is beyond me.

Like I said--- hillbillies.

To my sweet new Canadian friends from Calvary Baptist- Yous are wonderful. We had a time of it, eh? I loved y'alls accent too.

Now to all my bloggy friends who know about the big contest this weekend that will be announced tomorrow--- I need your help. While we have been country bumpkining our way around Canada, Holly and I have been feverishly reading all of your entries for the She Speaks Scholarship. Oh my stars. How are we ever going to pick???

If I win the lottery today, I will pay for you all. But since I don't own a lottery ticket, the chances of me winning might be slim to none. Therefore, I have to just pick one. Sigh, sigh, and sigh one more time.

So, if you have a spare moment, or 2, or 45 will you read through some of the linked posts today and send me an e-mail with a few of your favorites?

(Lysa1@Proverbs31.org)

I'll then collect all of everyone's favorites, combine them with my panel's favorites, toss their numbers in a baggie and PRAY! PRAY! PRAY!

Seriously---All of you are so deserving. I'm praying that God makes a way for everyone to come even if I can only be a part of one of those stories.

On a lighter note---Maybe I should do a follow up contest with more winners next week. I could give away things like soothers and used latex gloves.

Happy Sunday!

I own the world's most expensive trash can

My husband owns a Chick-fil-A restaurant. Some of you will have no clue what this is and that fact makes me cry for you. When I was a little girl I dreamed of marrying Shawn Cassidy or Donny Osmond --enter Garth Brook's song, "Thank God for unanswered prayers." Because in reality, my taste buds were destined for one marriage and one marriage alone. Oh the bliss of being able to walk up to the counter of nugget dream land and say, "Please promo-free that for me."

I'm telling you it keeps me happy and little too healthy. And for those of you keeping track, I'm still not at 142.

Anyhow, last year Chick-fil-A ran a contest and my husband WON a new Ford Expedition. Being the wife that I am, I offered to take the prize off his hands and drive the new vehicle for him. I'm big like that.

I really like this vehicle. I have respect for it. I keep the area where I sit very clean and tidy. It would never occur to me to use it as a trashcan. See my photo entered into evidence.

My kids on the other hand have issues. I hesitate to say they are trashy for obvious reasons but another word escapes me at the moment.

You see, yesterday I informed the kids that the car needed to be cleaned out. I'm just simply tired of pulling through the car pool line at school and watching things fly about when my kids exit the vehicle. I mean having a teacher say, "Hello Mrs. TerKeurst here's your dried up, crusty, science experiment of a waffle fry. Would you like it back?" --- makes me want to pinch somebody- hard. And that's never a good thing when you've told your children that pinching is bad.

Four of my five children were given this clean up order. They assured me beyond a shadow of a doubt that the clean up had occurred. I will now enter photos of what I found when I climbed into the part of my vehicle where my obviously blind children ride.

When questioned they replied, "Ohhhhh, we didn't know you meant the trash too. We just got our stuff out."

Silly children. They must still believe in magic cleaning fairies.

As a result, the two who were unfortunate enough to be at home this morning when Mom decided to put on her CSI hat had to do this in the freezing rain.

I stood at the window and chuckled. And took a photo for my blog of course. And then chuckled some more.

When they came inside I gave them a talking to about the importance of doing things right the first time. I also explained that doing little things out of obedience is how God prepares us for the bigger things in life. And then in a moment of sheer clarity I whipped out a saying that I just knew would cause them to finally rise up and call me blessed, "It's through the ordinary everyday things that God develops our character to match our calling."

To which Ashley replied, "You think God's calling me to be a janitor?"

No dear. Something way more trashy than that. A mom driver.